Breaking! Cyclist attacked by mud

I have to admit I am not the sort who goes out actively looking for mud. Maybe I am more of a tourist than a hardcore mountain biker. Cross? Great to watch with a beer.

I am also not the person in the Fucius household who does most of the washing.

But cyclefucius would not be cyclefucius if he did not ponder the fact that there are some necessary skills to be learned here.

Snow is melting right now giving a perfect blancmange of slush, ice and mud to challenge the cyclefucius bike-handling abilities. One day I may do a “cornering” post – something that doesn’t seem to come naturally, but which we are working on. (Be water, my friend…)

But actually – go figure – mountain bikes and tyres are actually designed to keep you upright in this type of situation. It was kind of fun.

For a while. After a few seconds, we discover that mountain bikes and tyres are also designed to spray fluid of varying degrees of opacity and viscosity up into the air, face, boots, backside, saddle, moving bike parts, cars, joggers, hikers and any other mountain flora and fauna.

cyclefucius has a particular issue with glasses at the moment – at the first sign of cyclefucius industrial strength perspiration, they steam up; at the second sign, the perspiration transfers itself onto the inside of the lenses. Couple this internal attack with the external attack launched from the tyres and the problem was not navigating the corners, but seeing the corners.

Yes it was fun. Kind of. But if any evidence were needed that cyclefucius does not have any Belgian ancestry, this is it. Roll on Spring.


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